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Monday, December 22nd, 2008
12:20a - The Thing From Another World
Things I Learned From This 1951 Movie

The military is a special club of manly-men who run in packs like sled dogs. They all listen to dreary jazz muzak while they smoke and play cards. They're all assholes. They hate journalists, they treat scientists like cattle, and they treat women like furniture.

Journalists are sarcastic layabouts who live to write sensational stories and bend the truth. They've got big mouths but they faint when things get rough. They hate the military.

Scientists are pompous, irresponsible wackjobs. They make nonsensical speeches about the power of nature, and make sissy requests about respecting murderous alien life. ("There are no enemies in science, professor. Only phenomena.") They're jealous of the special military club, so they lash out by hiding important information, causing personnel to die.

Women are furniture. They take notes and serve coffee. Sometimes they make clever conversation. You get the impression that when they're not on camera they're switched off and propped in a closet.

Aliens have a totally weird physiology and are geniuses, but when they fight, they best they can do is howl and charge around like drunken linebackers.

Sci-Fi classic indeed. Harumph.

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